My God, why hast thou forsaken me?

I'm very tempted to merely say "what the hell is this crap?!?" for a review and leave it at that. But no, my sense of altruism intrudes.

After opening promisingly enough with the live footage from 'Look of the Week' for "Astronomy Domine" (albeit not synched properly), things go quickly downhill. We're treated to some failure's student film for "See Emily Play" / "The Happiest Days Of Our Lives" (featuring The Republican High School Marching Band, led by Admiral Halsey) before "Another Brick In The Wall (Part 2)" bastardizes scenes from the movie and promotional video along with a STREET LAMP for a couple of minutes. "Uh oh" you say as the first 16-17 minutes of 'Delicate Sound of Thunder' are run through a few lame Photoshop filters to accompany "Echoes" for some arcane reason, with some circa '70-72 footage thrown in for good measure. "Hey You" features a spinning prism that looks like a bad screensaver, and "Marooned" gets a WinAmp plugin. Oh joy! "The Great Gig In The Sky" gets 4 minutes worth of the pig flying over Battersea power station, before a nonsensical photomontage leads is into the Amougies footage of "Set the Controls For The Heart Of The Sun." "Money" gets more hawt spinning-prism action, "Keep Talking" gets 'Pulse' footage run through those pesky Photoshop filters, and "Sheep" ... "Sheep" features 9 straight minutes of two volume meters side by side, the needles swinging back and forth while high-speed footage of night-driving is superimposed over top. This is when my What-The-Fuck circuit blew out and I started to lose feeling in my legs. Unable to run and grab the remote, I was then forced to endure closeup footage of a mirror ball being run through color filters for the entirety of "Sorrow" ... the same angle and same ball for NINE MINUTES.

Oh merciful Jesus, that's only the first disc. *whimper*

I should point out here that when live footage is actually used, you don't actually hear the live *music*, just a playback of the 'Echoes' album in it's entirety.

Okay, second disc. After making sure to have a physician on hand, I sat through 18 more minutes of Photoshopped 'Delicate Sound of Thunder' footage (starting from "One Of These Days") for "Shine On You Crazy Diamond." Just as a synapse in my head was about to burst, a merciful light shone forth from the TV ... Ian Eames' animation for "Time" (used in concert 1974-1989) was shown in its entirety (albeit out of synch). This made it much easier to bear when the rest of the song was accompanied with some flashy nonsensical garbage with text and filmstrip edges and shit shooting all over the screen, followed by more WinAmp plugins. Thankfully, the original 1983 video for "The Fletcher Memorial Home" was used for the song of the same name (out of synch a little yet again) ... an utterly silly piece of cack featuring Hitler and giant snails, but seeing the teacher from 'The Wall' infiltrate the set of "She Blinded Me With Science" is infinitely more bearable than any of the garbage used for the first disc. More WinAmp plugin fun for the duration of "Comfortably Numb," before the pain is relieved by the original 1982 video for "When the Tigers Broke Free." For some sick reason, 'Delicate Sound of Thunder' is used YET AGAIN, this time through a sort of "reflective orb" filter for "One Of These Days," before being run through a "television snow" filter for "Us and Them" and THEN a 'Westworld'-esque pixellation filter for "Learning to Fly."

My feet and hands begin to twitch uncontrollably. The foolishness is alleviated by the original "Arnold Layne" promo (out of synch again...detecting a pattern?), followed by yet another contender for World's Lamest Screensaver during "Wish You Were Here." This particular bit of idiocy is then repeated for "Jugband Blues," except now with the inflatable pig hovering in the middle. Thank God we're nearing the end, as the '94 backing film for "High Hopes" plays out ... unfortunately cut short, but hey. At this point I was thinking "phew, only one more song." But oh, that final cut was the unkindest cut of all. Little animated bikes zoom across the screen ringing their little bells ... before we watch grotesque muppet-esque pig-lizards hanging out in junkyards, cringing, and smoking ... all interspersed with a fruity '60s-style drawing of some dude's face ... phew, that's finally ove-...AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHUGH YET ANOTHER OSCILLOSCOPE, YEEAAAAURGH

I woke up an hour after the end of this piece of crap, not knowing where I was. If anyone ever tried to make you watch this, loan it or give it to you, or even worse, SELL you a copy ... punch said person in the nose. Hard. They deserve it.

'The Happiest Days of Our Lives'	'Money'
'Wish You Were Here'	'Bike'